Showing posts with label Inspirational. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Inspirational. Show all posts

Friday, April 30, 2021

ANNOUNCEMENT: My Commitment to You

I spent Anzac Weekend at musicprenuer bootcamp. I am not the person I was a week ago.

This week marks the beginning of a new journey for me. I'm choosing to walk into my destiny to live in my true value and make my dream come true.

My commitment to you is that from today, I'm going to do something to work on my dream six days a week. You have my permission to check in with me and say, "How are you doing with your commitment? Are you still working to make your dream come true?"

I don't know yet what the end result will look like, but I do know that today I have to change some things for that to happen. One of those is narrow my focus. Something has got to go.

For thirteen years here on Boutique Narelle I've been giving away my knowledge and expertise for free. I knew I should monetize it, but I didn't know how. Every time I tried, I got bogged down in the systems and technology skill it demanded.

Today I'm saying 🤚THAT'S IT, no more labouring to create value for other people without being rewarded for it.

Feedburner has alerted me that in July their free notification service will cease, which means those of you who receive an email notifying you of a new Boutique Narelle post will no longer receive that. I don't have the technology skills to create an alternative.

I also will not be returning to curating the modesty mall. Thank you to those who have messaged me with requests to explore the modest clothing services you offer. I apologise that I have not been able to accept your invitations due my lack of internet access.

After four years of not having broadband internet, now that I suddenly do (YIPPEE!!! #happydance), I've realized that my focus has switched -- from fulfilling the service that I have enjoyed bestowing through Boutique Narelle, to my song-writing passion which will bring me better reward for the time and energy I put into it. What this will look like on the BN blog, I don't know right now. The monthly Boutique Narelle post on the 1st Friday of the month will be discontinued in its current form following next week's post. If you are subscribed using Feedburner you will not receive notifications from July 2021.

I suggest that you follow me on the social media platform I currently use (www.facebook.com/NarelleWorboys), where you can see and get involved with my music journey, and of course details of my outfits and fashionista fun exploring beautiful modest fashion, because that's still me to the core.

I'm reminded of the quote, 

"BE THE CHANGE THAT YOU WANT TO SEE IN THE WORLD." 

I'm making space for me to visualise what that will look like for me. Maybe my doing that will inspire you to keep pursuing your dream, to be the change that you want to see in the world. I would love to hear that you're doing that.

Fiat lux.
Narelle 

Friday, September 4, 2020

Facing Unsolvable Clothing Problems: Searching Out the Benefits of Admitting Fashion Failure

I've resisted writing this. I'm the person who thinks up do-it-yourself solutions for everybody else's fashion troubles. It's humbling to admit I get desperately stuck in the wilderness of dressing well. To add that it happens periodically feels downright shameful.

But a mentor recently reminded me that his most raw and honest story produced the strongest connection with his audience, and the most uplifting outcome. So I will gird up the loins of my courage and share with you where I fail.

There is a fashion challenge that brings me into a state of frustration and despair, burdening me with a sense of depression I try to ignore but cannot shake for months at a time.

HELP! I've Got Nothing To Wear (That I Like)

It starts when my available modest clothing choices become saggy, stained, torn, or too small. I run out of repair or upgrade options, I don't have the time and energy available to make new garments, and shops don't stock the kind of modest clothing that I want or in my price range.

This leaves me with a sense of panic and much wasted time browsing my closet when I'm dressing to go out. It also leaves me with a sense of miserable disinterest in getting dressed for the day when I'm not going out.

Plan Something To Wear *That I Like*

I've learned to prioritize two things.

A) Prepare one smart outfit and reserve it for outing occassions. Keep it clean and looking nice.

B) Prepare one practical at-home outfit that I love to look at and that makes me happy when I get dressed. Wear it every day.

This might sound simple, but this year I couldn't even stay in control of these two solutions.

In the southern winter of 2019, while I spent hours on the couch recovering from a sprained and broken ankle, I planned one all-occasions dress for the following winter, to make me cosy and presentable whether I was visiting friends or convening a meeting.

As I regained my mobility in the spring, I got the fabric cut out...and came back to sew it towards the end of a super-hot summer. Feeling victorious, I hung it untested in my closet to await cold weather. 

Mistake Academy

When chill airs arrived, I realized that some of my newly enjoyed plumpness had departed. I'd measured the dress for a bigger me, and because it was lined, it would be a mission to resize it. I was too disheartened and too busy to fix it. The empty bodice felt demoralizing, but I had to wear it anyway.

Then I discovered I'd made three other mistakes.

The layering I'd planned for the dress didn't work as well as my mind had imagined. The drapey stretch polyester dress clung close enough to my waist to show the lumpy outline of large jeans pinched smaller. The merino top, which I'd bought specially so I had ONE without moth hole repairs, turned out to have a neckline too low to hide my cheap cotton/spandex tee (NZ $9, which after just three months' wear become saggy and off-colour). Even if I'm wearing a fresh tee shirt, the shifting tide of the different layers seems disorderly and I do not feel well-groomed.

After a winter of wearing my embarrassing Priority A outfit, I still feel frustrated at myself for not planning better. I have not yet found a solution that makes me feel good wearing it. Maybe by next winter I will have.

However, a few weeks ago I had a BREAKTHROUGH DISCOVERY with my Priority B outfit.

Happiness Versus Cosiness

Practical and comfortable for at-home, Priority B is the denim Yoked Tunic Dress featured in a previous Boutique Narelle post.

I realized I was feeling repelled by the delicate viscose bodice becoming unsightly with pilling and pulled threads. A tidy-up with a snag needle soon had that resolved.

Those cheap white tee shirts did not make this outfit look beautiful either, but a navy polycotton tee with a smarter rib neckline made me feel gloomy with all the dark fabric. 

A royal blue merino top was an improvement, but my *Bingo!* of delight came when I tried my aqua cashmere top with it. Merino is warmer than cashmere, but I decided to put up with less cosiness because of what the colour of this cashmere does for me when I look at it. It makes me feel HAPPY.

I haven't totally neglected the cosiness factor, because, surprising though it may seem, in southern winter temperatures, happiness won't keep you warm for long. I can say this cheerfully, because I found an aqua replacement for the warm but inky fleece I was wearing over the dress.

At NZ$9, it looked overpriced for a slightly pilly, slightly grubby secondhand fleece hoodie, but I really wanted the colour, so I took a risk. A warm soapy wash did wonders.

Thence followed a loose-thread-snipping and de-pilling session, then cottonbud application of isopropyl alcohol to stubborn stains. I've been comfortable, cosy, and happy ever since.

What I've Learned From This Process

It helps a lot to...

  • admit that clothing impacts my state of mind;
  • acknowledge how my closet challenges are making me feel;
  • identify one simple solution to pursue;
  • be patient with myself while I'm searching for that solution;
  • be humble in admitting my failures;
  • be kind to myself, remembering that failures are natural, acceptable, and valuable;
  • encourage myself that through openness, creativity, and persistence, there is hope for success;
  • take photos of the problem and discuss it with someone -- I might see it differently and discover a solution!

I hope you've seen something beautiful and inspiring here today.

Fiat lux!
Narelle


Thursday, January 1, 2015

HAPPY NEW YEAR! simple celebration fun and glamour with a modern-modest twist

For each a pretty dress, some beads and satin ribbon for understated bling, and a "hot day" hair-do, set against a vanilla wall and spiced with creativity and joy.

This is the "party space" we chose in which to celebrate with thankful hearts God's goodness to us in 2014, and to welcome another year in which to participate in and be witness to His handiwork.

Happy New Year, my friend. May your covering clothes and face of grace be a conduit for the beauty of the Lord Jesus Christ to a dark world.

Fiat lux! (Let there be light.)
Narelle

Thursday, November 20, 2014

Free Similcast: Leslie Ludy on True Purity and True Beauty

I'm delighted to announce a FREE SIMILCAST with bestselling author Leslie Ludy on 21 November 2014, 6-9pm MST. (That's Saturday, 2-5pm NZ time.)

Here's a sneak peek at what Leslie will be sharing.

SESSION ONE: true purity

In a generation of Christian young women who grew up with promise rings and abstinence pledges, why do purity commitments so often fail? In this powerful and inspiring session, Leslie will explore three key principles that mark the difference between true purity and counterfeit purity. You’ll gain a beautiful and practical vision for being set-apart in romance and relationships, experience restoration from past mistakes, and develop a Christ-enabled lifestyle of honor, faithfulness, and true purity.

SESSION TWO: true beauty

In today’s world, it’s all too easy to give lip-service to Christ while still living a self-centered existence. In this session, Leslie explores the difference between fitting Christ into your life and truly building your life around Him. You’ll discover the beauty, life, joy, and loveliness of Christ-centered femininity and learn what it means to be consecrated to Him in every aspect of your daily life.

Click here to tune in, and for more information about Set Apart Girl: http://setapartgirl.com/fridaynightspecial

Friday, August 1, 2014

The Value of Remembering: why World War One matters to you and me

4 August 2014 marks 100 years since the beginning of World War I, and I believe there are two good reasons to pay attention to the commemorations.


A STARTLING MEMORIAL: Pictures taken at the Cenotaph after the Dawn Parade, ANZAC Day. I wouldn't normally pair aqua with fire-engine red, but it was just ten days after our house fire and I had little choice in what I could wear. The angora/wool hat and layers of wool and polar fleece kept me warm. The waterproof skirt kept me dry (and clean) when photographic urges brought me in contact with the ground. =)

What Made New Zealand a Nation ?


First, Britain’s declaration of war on Germany marked not only the beginning of New Zealand’s involvement in WWI as part of the British Empire, but also the birth of New Zealand as a nation.
Our national identity was forged during those traumatic years.

The values that held us together during war and built our society after it were, to quote the RSA*, "compassion, comradeship, courage and commitment". Do we want these values in our lives, in our neighbourhoods today? What are we doing to teach them, to exercise them, to honour them?

Do We Actually Value Values?


Second, the price of international peace and security was massive for a small and pioneering country such as we were in 1914. Our forebears gave much to secure freedoms they thought worthy of sacrifice. The tragedy is that subsequent generations have neglected to nurture these freedoms or deliberately sought to erode them.

Today, these centenary commemorations have a very personal application. Lest we forget and mourn our loss of freedom and righteous values, let's recognize and emulate the integrity of our forefathers. Faith, family, country. Are they still worth dying for?

What we're doing about it

Click this link  for more details on "Women of Courage", presented by Isabel and Narelle Worboys during the "WWI Commemorative Concert" at the Dannevirke Town Hall, 3 August 2014.


* "Declaration of WWI was birth of nation"
http://www.rsa.org.nz/news/declaration-wwi-was-birth-nation

Sunday, May 11, 2014

Beauty Tip for Glamor Girl [Modesty WOF]



Here’s a beauty tip noted upon encounter with a dust-robed Ford Thunderbird that didn’t quite live up the promise of its number plate.


When driving out to take the air,
O Glamor Girl, do have a care
The dust upon your pink
Has showered down the sink.
A luxury interior
Is best enhanced by clean exterior.
What fellow yearns for flirt and dirt,
Or wink and stink?
No gentleman, I think.
Be sure your feminigning ways
Are true to what your signage says.

MODESTY WARRANT OF FITNESS
I’ve had a good chuckle creating this poem and poster, but it’s also a good reminder to “put my car in” for a warrant of fitness. If I claim to be a modest woman, how well does my behaviour and appearance match this? What about my thought life, and the way I speak?

When I dress in the morning, what attitudes am I putting on? Am I grooming my soul with as much care as I groom my body? Or, conversely, am I so focused on my inner grooming that I neglect my outward appearance?

Perhaps I need to devote time to improving my presentation skills. Maybe I’ve been lazy in both beauty skill and modest attitude.

Like the mechanic at the garage, I run a check list and when I see something that could impede the safe and efficient running of my “vehicle”, I note it and take steps to repair or replace the problem parts.

This is your friendly W.O.F. reminder. Fiat lux! [Let there be light!] In God’s light, we shall see light.*
Best wishes,
Narelle

*Psalm 36:9

Sunday, April 27, 2014

BURNED OUT: when the fiery furnace of TROUBLE gets even hotter

NIGHT OF DISASTER IN A MODEST NIGHTDRESS
All the best laid plans can go AWOL when you blink, and that’s what happened to my intention to sew a month of fixes for my worn-out modest wardrobe.

My “blink” happened when our dishwasher caught fire in the middle of the night, 13th April 2014, and we were flame-and-smoked out of our home.** I had completed one sewing project that very afternoon, a nightdress pattern I’ve adapted to cope with inadvertent social situations. There are two reasons I’m thankful I wore it immediately.
  1. I was modestly covered when I had to leave the house in a hurry and watch the fire brigade rescue my worldy goods from destruction, and I wasn’t worried about tripping over the saggy-baggy knit in the dark, which I would have been in my 2-year-old nightdress.
  2. All my sewing equipment, paper patterns, and fabric that were laid out ready to start the next project were damaged by soot from the fire. Thus would have been my new nightie if I had left it out to admire it like I usually do with finished projects.

When your plans are halted so abruptly, and when you realized how near you came to losing your home and your life, it takes a long time to work through the shock and find a way back to routine. Any sort of routine. And you constantly have to extend grace to yourself (and the rest of family) while you work (and sleep) your way toward that goal.

NO QUICK FASHION FIX, NO SHOPPING TRIP
There is frustration at every step, and extra obstacles on top of that. It’s taken three times longer than promised for our “emergency” dry cleaning, and there’s no sign of it yet. If I thought I was short of clothing three weeks ago, I’m even shorter now!

My peculiar health challenges, my location at the ends of the earth, and my preference for full length hems mean I can’t just go out and buy new clothes. It was ten days before I was able to borrow a sewing machine and get a sewing station set up in the motel where we’re camping while our house is cleaned and the kitchen rebuilt. Even then, it was a challenge getting patterns and fabric.




CARE PACKAGES BRING RELIEF
However, there is also blessing at every step. My sisters sent a Care Package of small, essential sewing tools, a treasure box of love notes from the children, food supplies (the ingredients that keep me well are hard to source), and the loan of a sister for three days to help me make new sewing patterns and cut out fabric.

Friends and strangers in our small town have reached out with kindnesses that warm our hearts. A footstool and fresh baking for Dad. Pre-prepared meals and kitchen space for Mum. A windproof jacket and a sewing gauge* for me.

*Not currently available in accessible shops.

UNEXPECTED ANZAC BONUS
A surprising blessing is that I’m just a block from the Cenotaph war memorial and I was able to walk to both the 5:30am Dawn Parade and 8:30am Civic Parade on 25th April, ANZAC Day. My camera and I lingered after each service, meaning I was able to enjoy a roaring sunrise in solitary splendour and capture photographs of the Cenotaph standing sentinel in the fiery rays. I hope to feature these in the new ANZAC music video I’m planning, “The Rose and the Red Poppy”, inspired by my hat.

What I'm wearing:
Peaked Knit Cap (lined) from Postie, with RSA-issued poppy and rose by Boutique Narelle
Butterfly zip polar fleece from The Warehouse, shaping and button styling added by Boutique Narelle
Acrylic fringed scarf from The Warehouse
Waterproof rain skirt by Boutique Narelle
Wool socks from Kathmandu

Red leather lace-up shoes from Envy

I don’t recommend the colour palette I’m wearing, but at times like these, you make the best of what you’ve got!
ATTITUDE OF GRATITUDE
I could write a book on how God has brought good things out of our traumatic situation. I see His hand at work every day, reminding me that when we trust Him with everything, He can turn even the direst situation meant for our harm into something beautiful. We have much for which to thank Him.

Right now, I’m thankful…

…that my netbook and camera were in my studio where soot damage was much lighter, mostly affecting furnishings;

…that a friend has offered us free use of their WIFI (and comfy lounge) so I can upload this post;

…that as I came online for the first time in nine days, I found messages of love and encouragement.

WHAT I’VE LEARNED THROUGH THE FIERY TRIAL
What perspective can I share from this position of Burned Out, when the fiery furnace of Trouble just seems to keep getting hotter?

I’ve learned to
  • release the expectations I had,
  • embrace flexibility,
  • cling to God for grace, peace, and patience to take each day as it comes, and
  • cultivate an attitude of continual thankfulness for what He has given me.
By doing this, I’ve found remarkable joy in the midst of these challenges.

I pray that through whatever trouble your life throws at you, you too will find the way to persistent joy amid your trials.
Fiat lux!
Narelle

**For more pictures of the fire, click here: www.facebook.com/NarelleWorboys.

Sunday, March 23, 2014

The Longing to be Beautiful, and how one black woman has opened dialogue on it

Black, white, or in between, if you've ever wished you look different than you are, watch this video.

If you've ever wished God gave you some-one else's features, I urge you to listen to this compelling 5-minute speech. If you know a girl or woman who makes negative comments about her skin colour, hair type, body type, or intellectual capability, watch this and share it with her.

Oscar Winner Lupita Nyong'o shares her journey from self hate to gracious representative of womanly confidence. Her honesty and insight into the core of beauty reportedly left her entire audience speechless.

http://youtu.be/ZPCkfARH2eE

This is so powerful! Watch and share! I've listened to Lupita Nyong'o twice already.

I hope this inspires more professional photographers to choose women of color as their models. Here at Boutique Narelle and the Modesty Mall we serve a readership from many nations and cultures, and our vision is to provide an "everyman" median representation. A very little calculation of world population will tell you that's not going to be pale. When not restricted by store promotions or having to model my own illustrations, I look for brown and black skin istock.

We also required neck-to-knees coverage and non-sensual styling, making the hunt thus far limited to images I can count on one round of my fingers. If you're reading this and you're producing this kind of resource, or want to, I'd love to hear from you.

Ladies, we have the ability to restore balance to the world of women's imagery. It starts in your heart and mine. Let's do it.

Monday, March 3, 2014

Loss, Grief, and Vision: carrying on after tragedy

 
EASY FOR SOME, HARD FOR US
I'm wistfully reading Facebook group comments from ladies who's modest clothing needs are easily and cheaply solved by a quick trip to a thrift store.

I've never been privileged to experience that.

If you live in a small town that has a secondhand supply of quality modest clothing, you are BLESSED indeed. In New Zealand, if you don't have easy access to a city recycled clothing centre, it's make your own or buy new - usually online, so factor in shipping costs. Rural living usually also means that buying fabric is difficult or expensive.

Yes, modest dressing is a challenge to the budget.

And it's hard work.

But it shouldn't be. Modest femininity should be fun. It should be full of delight. It should be easier.

That seems like a far stretch.

But I know I can make it better.

WIPE OUT
I've spent six years seeking ways to make it better. Then a week ago, I lost all of my images from this website: garment recommendations, modest outfit styling tips, modest beauty solutions and personal care advice, sewing tutorials and do-it-yourself fixes for immodest apparel...in a blink, the visual element of my life's work GONE.



It's not just hiding, it's been permanently deleted, and the blogger backup turned out not to be a backup at all. I have most of the images on harddrive, but finding and reconnecting them to the appropriate text is a task so massive I can't even begin to contemplate it at this time.

AFTER THE STORM
How do you carry on after a tragedy? Here are seven survival techniques I've learned that are helping me get through my loss with grace.

1. Admit your loss, and let go.
2. Tell your soul to hope in God.
3. Thank Him continually and specifically for His goodness to you.
4. Allow yourself to grieve.
5. Re-establish routine. Take one day at a time.
6. Complete something, anything small, and celebrate it.
7. Remember your vision.

If you're dealing with loss and tragedy in your own life, I know these will work for you, too. How do I know? Because I'm like you. I'm an ordinary woman using extraordinary techniques. They work.

How do you carry on after a tragedy? First regain your equilibrium, then remember your vision. I can still make modest living better for you and for me. That purpose has not changed.

I'm pushing ahead with the new website and continuing to seek ways to fund it and staff it. I'm excited about the service we're creating, and look forward to sharing it with you.

COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS
In the meantime, if you don't have the benefit of good quality secondhand clothing stores nearby, make use of our Modest Mall international shopping tool. Shops are constantly being added. And countries. Last week I went on a shopping spree (window kind) to Brazil! Google's "Translate Page" is a wonderful thing. If you feel the cold like I do, you might want to check out the lined, wool-blend skirt-pants and maxi skirts featured in the "Best Stores in China" section.

If you haven't done so already, subscribe on the sidebar so we can stay connected. I would be honoured to be part of your journey toward living modestly, loving femininity, and leading your heart toward true beauty.

If you would like more personal interaction with me, please join me on Facebook at www.fb.com/NarelleWorboys.

Fiat lux!
Narelle


I will not be afraid of evil tidings: my heart is fixed, trusting in the LORD. [from Psalm 112:7]

Wednesday, November 20, 2013

Marvellous Quotes for Modest Women!

Whenever Narelle encounters quotes she thinks will encourage, inform, and inspire ladies desiring to be modest, she posterizes them and pins them to Marvellous Quotes for Modest Women. Here are some examples.

Former lingerie model Kylie Bisutti speaks of giving up something she loved because she knew it was displeasing to God. Have you found yourself in that position? What happened next? Joy or misery? Here's what happened to Kylie:
Former lingerie model Kylie Bisutti speaks of giving up something she loved because she knew it was displeasing to God. Have you found yourself in that position? What happened next? Joy or misery? www.boutiquenarelle.blogspot.com
"Good character is more to be praised than outstanding talent. Most talents are, to some extent, a gift. Good character, by contrast, is not given to us. We have to build it, piece by piece -- by thought, choice, courage, and determination." www.boutiquenarelle.blogspot.com
 lol We've all been here, haven't we? www.boutiquenarelle.blogspot.com

www.boutiquenarelle.blogspot.com
Enjoy more marvellous quotes for modest women with Boutique Narelle on Pinterest.

Saturday, August 18, 2012

What is beauty? Can I be beautiful? How do I do it?


Boutique Narelle is excited to signpost for you a webinar that’s not just skin deep, seven one-hour sessions with Anna-Sofia and Elizabeth Botkin which you can watch at your convenience.
Reclaiming Beauty: A New Look at How to Glorify God in Your Body” covers topics ranging from such practical issues as skincare, fitness, posture, voice, modesty, home-made beauty products, and color analysis…to subjects as penetrating as personal identity, insecurity, comparisons, worldliness, vanity, idolatry, our attitude toward others, and the state of our hearts before the Lord.


Friday, November 4, 2011

Misleading our Girls about Beauty

"Never Too Young? Misleading our Girls about Beauty" by Dr. Albert Mohler


The New York Times reports that even the youngest of girls are being targeted as consumers of cosmetics and beauty treatments. The elementary [primary school] set is showing up in trendy salons for pedicures and manicures.

The intense self-focus that many young women display and their attention to how they present themselves is affecting 6- to 9-year-olds. “We live in a culture of insta-celebrity,” Ms. Skey said. “Our little girls now grow up thinking they need to be ready for their close-up, lest the paparazzi arrive.”

You can read the article by Dr. Albert Mohler here, or listen to or download the audio version here.

Are you training yourself in True Beauty? Are you sharing what you've learned with your daughters, nieces,  younger sisters or friends? Or, are you and they, through neglect, wide open to the destructive influences of the pagan culture in which we live?

Girls are never too young to start learning, and if wise women do not take up the mantle of instruction, they will automatically assume the prevalent characteristics of their environment which flood insidiously from television, movies, the internet, books, magazines, and urban graphics, and are cultivated as attentively in churches as they are in the world. Suicides, eating disorders, and early promiscuity are just some of the tragic results. Now that you're warned, what are you going to do about it?

Friday, August 26, 2011

Duggars on Modesty

A Public Expression of Modest Femininity

I love meeting people who are courageous and content in modesty. I've been remotely-introduced to these happy, beautiful young ladies whom a TV channel finds interesting enough to make multiple programs about and whom viewers find fascinating. The American family have also published two books which I found to be complete page-turners.
"The Duggars: 20 and Counting" recounts some of the questions asked by viewers about the way the girls dress, and includes answers from the Duggar parents or their daughters.

e-Mail to the Duggars
Q: Do your daughters always wear long dresses? Why?
A: First, we want to stress that this is our family's practice. We don't put our conditions on other people or tell others what they should wear. Our standards of modesty are based on personal prayer and Bible study. We want to attract others' interest to our faces and our character, rather than to our bodies. For us, that means long pants for the boys and long skirts for the girls and no low-cut tops. Amazingly, some of our older children have developed stronger convictions about dress standards than we have.

Here's a question of which I've heard many variations. I love how 16-year-old Jessa responded to it. (Click image to enlarge.)

Click here to enjoy photos of the Duggar girls and cute girl-outfits. Jessa and Jinger are the family experts on how to dress modernly-modest, and most of their shopping is done at thrift stores. Notice how they use layering.

Thank you, Duggars, for sharing your life with the world!

Their second book, "A Love that Multiples"*, includes modesty links in the Resources section. I had a browse and am delighted to add www.ChristopherandBanks.com to Boutique Narelle's recommended stores list.

This resource link answered a question I'd been longing to ask the Duggar girls: What is that garment you're wearing under your t-shirts?

After studying photos of the way the girls dress, I deciphered that they have access to a layering garment I've never seen in New Zealand or in any online store to date. It has more shoulder coverage than a camisole. It has a crew-neck like a t-shirt, but no sleeves. Its hem is at hip level, so it's not a tee-neck/dickie/modesty panel.

You can purchase them from www.christopherandbanks.com or plus sizes sister-store www.cjbanks.com. The store calls the garment a tank, but it's quite unlike the tanks available here which are nothing more than glorified singlets. My description is a sleeveless crewneck tee. 

Wearing two layers of cotton knit won't be a comfortable solution for hot climates (or those that have summer without air-conditioning). It's a wonderful modesty fixer for mild climates, and it might mean you can wear those pretty blouses made of sheer fabric.

If you'd like to find out more about the fascinating, inspirational Duggar family, their website is www.DuggarFamily.com.

I still have a question for the Duggar ladies: How do you get your hair kinky like that?


Note: We are very sorry for the missing images in this post. They were unexpectedly and irriversibly gobbled by Google+. 😱😭

Friday, July 29, 2011

Bare Bosom Teacher? No Thank You!

When Frances* retired from teaching, she became a student again, learning to play the cello.  She loved her teacher Marie's skill and knack of inspiring her. She also appreciated her ladylike standards.

After two years' collaboration, Marie announced the bad news. She would soon be moving to another city. Frances and the other students would have to find a new teacher or else travel 5-6 hours per lesson.

Shortly after this devastating news, Frances attended a regional cello day attended by 45 cellists and their teachers. Frances used the opportunity to survey the one teacher who would live closer than Marie. She was not happy with what she observed and came home with the despairing conviction that she would have to travel for lessons.

What do you think it was that swung her opinion against the teacher? Any guesses? It was something that would be easy to fix and yet seemed insurmountable. The teacher was sharing with the world a vast expanse of her bare bosom.

Frances shuddered at the thought of the woman leaning over her to correct her finger positions or bowing technique. She did not need that distraction.

She remembered Marie's other students who were in search of a teacher. Would the parents of the 11 and 12 year old boys be happy with their sons studying bare breasts along with their music?

You might ask, What's wrong with a male getting an eyeful of public breast? You will find an answer to that in this letter from a Christian male who longs to honour women in his thought life but meets with continual obstacles placed in front of him by the very women he wishes to honour.

Wondering what to do about preventing public eyefuls? Set an example with your own dress, by being consistent in this, then share with other women what immodesty does to the men we profess to care about.

Cello teacher Marie has grimaced over a particular high school who would not permit female students to change out of their A-line uniform skirt into sports trackpants for cello lesson and so they have to hike their skirt way up in order to get their cello between their knees.

What should a modest girl wear when playing cello?

I've viewed footage of world renown cellist Jacqueline du Pre', of actress Emily Watson who played du Pre in the biopic "Hilary and Jackie" (I do not recommend the movie), and of Keri Russell who plays fictional Lyla Novacek in the movie "August Rush". These concert cellists wore full skirted dresses, usually floor length but sometimes knee length, which allowed them to get their knees apart but still kept them covered.

We don't all wear an evening gown when we make music, so how do we handle our everyday situations?

Marie recommends that her female students wear dress trousers, and was stunned to learn that Frances doesn't own any. This is because her shape doesn't make this sort of trouser a comfortable option. She usually wears skirts, but she discovered that her petticoat created a problem. Her solution is to choose skirts made of non-cling, non-transparent fabric and to remove the petticoat before playing cello.

Whether you play cello or some other instrument, or make music with your voice, take a pause and consider: Is my appearance as well as my music to God's glory and man's benefit? If it isn't, what do I need to change?

May God bless you as you walk the narrow path.


*Names changed to protect privacy.


"You are beautiful; yes. That much I can see without you doing anything to convince me. But please do not entice me to notice you. Is it not enough that God endowed you with the beauty you possess? And that He has made you a gift to your present or future husband? Please help me to rejoice with him rather than tempt me to steal from him."
From "A Godly Man Comments on Modesty", Pure Life Ministries Free Resources


Note: We are very sorry for the missing images in this post. They were unexpectedly and irretrievably gobbled by Google+. 😱😭

Friday, February 12, 2010

A Prince's Dream Girl

Are you internally breath-taking?
Drop-dead gorgeous on the inside?

The physical beautifying obsessions of men and women demonstrate they are not willing to grow old gracefully or fearlessly. We all grow old (27 is the scientific age which this process begins), and we all know physical beauty doesn't last. Surely, if we want a healthy investment portfolio, we will devote our energies to amassing the treasures of a beautiful heart!

She is the most acclaimed and celebrated woman of the world's all-time best selling book, the Bible. Prince Lemuel's dream girl became the millenium Ideal for others to aspire to.

"His princess was loving, faithful, diligent, financially astute, encouraging, disciplined, healthy, positive, compassionate, generous, prudent, stylish, creative, strong, dignified, wise, responsible, and humble. She loved Lemuel, but most of all, she feared God."

Is this the sort of Dream Girl you aspire to be?
What do you need to change in order for that to happen?


Thispost was inspired by Mary Simpson's book 31 Girl. Grateful acknowledgement to Hannah Harward for introducing me, and thanks to Mary for permission to quote a paragraph from the closing chapter of the book.
Ed. Note: While I consider the written content of "31 Girl" to be excellent, many of the photographic illustrations do not meet the standard of modesty this website strives to promote.

Friday, January 22, 2010

Pause at the Mirror: How to Be Confident in Your Appearance

"I looked in the mirror," said the woman, "and it was not my friend."

How often do you encounter a passing mirror and grimace in distress at your image? How often do you apply a quick pat, a twitch, a tweak, a dab of paint, and hope that the world will somehow overlook your flaws and be enchanted by your beauty?

I've learned to laugh at myself and not take my appearance too seriously. I have a chronic illness, I see the accruing damage it's done, and I've had to accept the possibility that the vision of gorgeousness that's surely hidden in me somewhere may never be revealed to the world.

CAN I BE CONFIDENT IN MY APPEARANCE?
Have you ever met a girl who was unwaveringly confident in her appearance? I mean in her private moments as well as the public ones. I've met cocksure gals whose pride in their appearance is a cover for their secret insecurity, and I guarantee there's not a woman on this planet who when honestly examining herself does not flinch. How, then, does a woman develop confidence in her appearance?

THE SECRET I DISCOVERED
The good news is that a priceless, timeless value lies in my inner beauty, beauty that reflects the nature of Christ. Placing primary significance on this gives me a confidence in who I am and how I look that cannot come from what I see in the mirror.

The body passes away. The soul is eternal. When was the last time you peered at your soul? Did you grimace? What attention did you give to it?--as much and as often as you do to the preparations of your outward appearance?

I pray that we'll develop a passion to "put on Christ" as our inner beauty treatment, and be as devoted to it as we are to our outer body care.

Image No. 1: Shadows distort shape and highlight flaws.
Image No. 2: No makeup, just positioned at a different angle to the light source.

Check how you're positioned to the light source, Jesus Christ!


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Note: We are very sorry about the missing images in this post. They were tragically and irreversibly gobbled by Google+.

Friday, December 25, 2009

Prayer for the lady reading this...

Dear LORD God,
The lady reading this is beautiful, classy, and strong,
and I know you love her.
Help her live her life to the fullest.
Please promote her and cause her to excel above her expectations.
Help her shine in the darkest places where it seems impossible to love.
Protect her at all times, lift her up when she needs you the most,
and let her know what when she walks with You she will always be safe.



A HEART RESTORED BY THE HEALERS' TOUCH

Tender heart, your sorrows are not forgotten.
They are noticed by the one Who made you and Who holds you even now.
When you feel fragmented by loss, frustration, despair,
God gathers each piece that you give to Him
And gently, masterfully creates a new life --
A life that reflects His warm love
And His promises for you.

Here's to all those who have had tearstained pillows, sighed wordless prayers, dried the tears of others while fighting their own, fought their way back from the pit of despair, and to those still wandering through the valley...

Keep the faith...God is there even when your tears blur your view.

From "Wounded Hearts - Renewed Hope"
by Michelle McKinney Hammond

Friday, December 26, 2008

Teach Your Daughter True Beauty, Part 2

Continued from Part 1 which exhorts fathers to combat society's lies about beauty and teach their daughters the truth.
By Ryan Malone September 2008 edition of Trumpet »

Girls, this article may have been written to fathers, but we can benefit equally from the beauty truths and tips expressed here. My prayer is that you will discover the Royal Princess the Almighty designed you to be. Ed.

A Facelift for Free

God’s Word also has a lot to say about hairstyles, jewelry, cosmetics and clothing. Isaiah 3:16 shows that the end-time decline of our nations is directly tied to the improper values in women’s appearance—the power they try to exert through their beauty—whether in applying cosmetics or in walking seductively. The rest of that chapter says God will strip them of their beauty and ornaments. This society, preoccupied with its warped sense of beauty, is about to be destroyed.

What our daughters need most of all is real, LASTING spiritual beauty. You can help give that to your daughter. Ecclesiastes 8:1 says “wisdom maketh [the] face to shine.” Teach her the truth about eternal, inward beauty and that will cause her face to shine more than all those who spend thousands of dollars a year in keeping their face “lifted.”

The Apostle Peter, using jewelry metaphors, exhorts Christian women to focus their adorning on the “hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price” (1 Peter 3:4). He also points to the outwardly beautiful Sarah, wife of Abraham, to teach where her real beauty lay: Her trust in God and His government gave her the most beautiful adorning any woman could desire (verses 5-6). This is the fundamental lesson in spiritual comeliness.

In 1 Timothy 2:9, the Apostle Paul addresses physical fashion, telling Christian women to “adorn themselves in modest [well-arranged] apparel.” Then the rest of the verse shows how true beauty comes from godly humility and the development of the mind in understanding God’s Word. If our daughters seek that, they will one day possess eternal beauty—with a radiant face, shimmering hair and dazzling eyes. God’s Word promises that!

Help Her Stand Out in Society

How can we help our daughters radiate the genuine happiness that enhances their beauty? Much of that comes from the happiness and encouragement WE GIVE THEM. They look to us fathers for that support; they need us to let them know what we find admirable about them. If we show them the proper kind of love and attention, they will feel adored, protected and truly beautiful. A daughter who is not cared for by her father will either feel she is not worthy of a man’s love or will seek that attention and care in misguided, damaging ways.

With all this in place, you can then help her understand what makes her beautiful physically. Teach her that the majority of her outward beauty rests in her face—in her eyes and smile. Also teach her—with the aid of her mother if she is in the picture—that good hygiene and proper health often does more for the appearance than clothing. Exercise can aid in appropriate muscle tone and healthy skin.

Also encourage her to develop feminine mannerisms. Helen Andelin, in her book Fascinating Womanhood, states, “There are thousands of rather plain women with irregular features and faulty builds who succeed in being attractive to men because they are models of femininity. On the other hand, there are thousands of other women who have beautiful faces and features but who, because of woodenness, or masculinity of manner, never impress men as being especially attractive. When a woman is tender, soft, fun-loving, lovable, and also innocent and pure, who stops to inquire if she has beauty in the classical sense? [T]o most men she seems a paragon of femininity. To them she is beautiful!”

Teach your daughter about these attributes of lasting spiritual beauty. Love and adore her; set the example of possessing positive energy. And if she stands out a little in this ugly world, then let it be for the RADIANT BEAUTY that God is creating in her and for being the royal princess that she is! •


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Friday, December 19, 2008

Teach Your Daughter True Beauty, Part 1

Fathers! You may not realize how important physical beauty is to your daughter. Here’s how you can combat society’s lies about beauty and teach your daughter the truth!

By Ryan Malone September 2008 edition of Trumpet »

The pressure on a young girl to be pretty is one of the greatest weights on the female mind—especially in the Western world.

In his 2001 book "Bringing Up Boys", Dr. James Dobson tells a story that all parents of girls should heed. When Western television penetrated the islands of the South Pacific for the first time, it “projected images of gorgeous, very thin actresses who starred on Melrose Place, Beverly Hills 90210, and other teen-oriented shows. Four years later, a survey of 65 Fijian girls revealed how their attitudes had been shaped (or warped) by what they had seen. Almost immediately, the girls began to dress and try to fix their hair like Western women.” Officials, he reported, saw “serious changes in eating habits among … adolescents. Those who watched tv three times per week or more were 50 percent more likely to perceive themselves as ‘too big’ or ‘too fat’ than those who did not. More than 62 percent had attempted to diet in the previous 30 days.”

The pressure to be pretty is a monstrous thing. Add to that how society defines pretty, and it can be perilous. It can produce in our daughters a dangerous cocktail of vanity, materialism, health problems and a host of character flaws.

Do our young girls have any hope to escape the rank deception that comes their way about their physical appearance? How can the false images popular culture relentlessly thrusts on them be combatted?

The answer lies in the home, with the parents—particularly the FATHER!

Make Your Daughter Beautiful

Fathers: You have a special role as the first male authority in your daughter’s life to ensure that she not only feels beautiful but that she also knows what true beauty is!

How can we make our daughters beautiful in a godly way? The answer lies in understanding how God adorned the first woman.

When God clothed Adam and Eve in animal skins (see Genesis 3:20-21), the Hebrew for clothed means to don with apparel or raiment—namely outer garments. It implies adding attractiveness rather than hiding shamefulness” (Herbert W. Armstrong, "The Missing Dimension in Sex"—request a free copy). Being clothed with raiment can make your daughters prettier. Yet, this Satan-dominated society often wants to define “pretty” by how much skin you show. Of course, different contexts (and even cultures) allow for different coverings.

If you want your daughters to be beautiful, adorn them (and teach them how to adorn themselves) God’s way. Teach them that modest apparel makes them more beautiful. It is ugliness to be immodest, which can arouse lust in a man and lead to more ugliness.

What’s more, the main seat of physical beauty for the female is not in the body or the clothing. It is in the FACE.

How Supermodels Make Themselves Ugly

Dale Carnegie, in "How to Win Friends and Influence People", relates a story about a dinner party he attended. “One of the guests, a woman who had inherited money, was eager to make a pleasing impression on everyone. She had squandered a modest fortune on sables, diamonds and pearls. But she hadn’t done anything whatever about her face. It radiated sourness and selfishness. She didn’t realize what every man knows: namely, that the expression a woman wears on her face is far more important than the clothes she wears on her back.”

Yes, every man—every FATHER—knows that. How often do you remind your daughter that the most beautiful thing about her is her SMILE? Yet how many “beautiful” women grace magazine covers with sour looks on their faces? It’s meant to be seductive or sexy, but as a man and father, I’m troubled by it. Not only is it intimidating, it’s not nearly as pretty. Teach your daughter that she exudes beauty when she has a POSITIVE attitude and expression on her face.

Mr. Armstrong wrote, concerning sex appeal, that it “is somewhere between 95 percent and 99 percent what one sees from the neck up! It is, mostly, what one sees in the face of the other which exerts the appeal” (op. cit.).

But our deceived society and its fashion designers seem to think that beauty is 95 to 99 percent from the neck DOWN. Modern fashion wants to show as much cleavage as possible, or as much of the top of the rear end as possible, or when swimming, to show as much of the gluteus maximus as possible. Yes, God designed those areas to be beautiful in a marital relationship. But ask your daughter: Does she want to be a mere OBJECT? Or would she rather attain beauty the way God intended it to be done—by living a happy life that SHINES through the face and then adorning the rest of her body modestly in a way that highlights her figure but doesn’t draw undue attention to it over her character, mind, sparkle, energy and smile?

God is not AGAINST outward beauty, but He also says it IS VAIN: It won’t last but a few years—it’s merely a TYPE of the spiritual beauty God wants to praise us for. Still, God made sure Eve was physically appealing to her husband. God’s Word describes women like Sarah, Rebecca and Esther as outwardly beautiful.

Continued next week with:
A Facelift for Free
and
Help Her Stand Out in Society
Go to Part 2.

Friday, May 2, 2008

From Male Clothing to Feminine

‘In seeking to become modest, I became masculine.’Genevieve Smith's Testimony on Femininity and Modesty

I’m the eldest of seven children and currently clock in at 24 years of age. I was blessed by being born into a gung-ho Christian family located in central New Zealand. I was raised to dress modestly. To me, being modest meant wearing clothing which was not skimpy, tight or revealing. But somehow, along the way, in seeking to become modest, I became masculine.

The Slippery Slip


I always was something of a tomboy growing up. I preferred trousers to skirts, mainly because I didn’t like any of my skirts, but also because feminine attire would have been unpractical for a young girl who liked to romp with her younger brothers, climb trees and dig holes with them in the garden! As I grew up and matured, and as the fashions changed it became harder and harder to find clothing which I considered to be modest. I started to sew my own clothing and this allowed me to sew skirts which I liked. I began to wear skirts more and more often.

About four years ago, my brother and I took off for the USA for an extended overseas experience. I packed two pairs of trousers and two skirts – all garments I had sewed myself. When the time came to wash my clothes, I put them through the dryer and my trousers and skirts, being used to being dried on a clothes line in New Zealand, all shrank. What a dilemma! I found myself in foreign country in need of replenishing my wardrobe. This proved to be a difficult task. The clothing in the women’s sections all seemed too flimsy and impractical. And they seemed to be made for women much smaller than my height of 5’11”. And so I turned to the men’s section to find garments which were loose, baggy and ‘modest’ enough for me to feel comfortable wearing.

The Discovery


Then one day I looked down at myself and thought, ‘I look just like a man.’ It was true. From my shoes to my sweater my clothing had all come from the men’s section. This is when I realized that in seeking to be modest I’d become masculine. I was truly horrified. I’d been seeking to please God with my modesty, but realized that I wasn’t pleasing Him by being masculine. In fact, I realized that my masculine appearance sent the message that I was rejecting God’s gifts of womanhood and femininity to me. It struck me that that was what I was missing: femininity. I needed to be feminine just as much as I needed to be modest. This would be pleasing to God.

The Road to Recovery (and Feminine Modesty!)


The area of femininity became a major subject of study for me. I read books, talked to peers, sat under the teaching of older women and attempted to learn all I could about being feminine. One book I read described femininity as being the opposite of masculinity. This helped me a lot. I connected this concept with the ideas that I was learning that colours and colour combinations can be feminine or masculine, that various fabrics can be feminine or masculine, that patterns on fabric can be feminine or masculine, that cuts and styles and forms of tailoring can be feminine or masculine. My wardrobe went through a reformation, and indeed continues to reform as I learn more about femininity.

To ensure I keep learning and growing and don’t start to cruise, I’ve put into place a number of initiatives. Firstly, I review my wardrobe every six months or so either by myself or with the help of a family member or friend. Immodest/unfeminine clothing simply has a way of making its way into my wardrobe. Secondly, I’ve started a folder on femininity. Articles, pictures of feminine looking women or pieces of clothing, fabric cuttings, colour combinations and other findings relating to femininity all go into my folder.

The Lord is good. Not only has He opened my eyes about the importance of femininity, but He has shown me how important a witness I have as a Christian girl to this pagan world in the way that I dress. May my wardrobe continue to reform in ways that please the Lord. I praise the name of the Lord.
~ Genevieve Smith, 2004


Do you have a story of your tranformation from masculine to feminine appearance? We'd love to hear it. Email us at NarelleWorboys@gmail.com.